Random Thoughts for the Day
When a blogger gets writer’s block, is it called writer’s blogue?
There should be a law that when you hit 65, you need to retake your driver’s license. No excuses. (I reserve the right to alter this thought when I turn 65.)
Biggest Truth I learned from my college buddy Dave: Women are not the worst drivers on the planet. It’s guys wearing hats. Seriously. Next time you see a horrible driver, take a look and 9 times out of 10, it’s some guy wearing a hat.
I would give my left nut to make time travel possible. No, make that my right nut.
Marijuana should be legalized. Cigarettes on the other hand…
If America is truly the melting pot, full of countless races, religions and creeds, then why are there only two big political parties?
Despite what ESPN may think… Rock, Paper, Scissors is not a sport. Neither is darts. Nor bowling.
My two favorite winter jokes:
- Why can’t snowmen have kids? Because they’ve got snowballs.
- Why was the snowman smiling? Because he heard the snowblower coming.
I miss Calvin & Hobbes.
How sucky is the new Indiana Jones movie going to be?
Twix bars used to be one of my top 3 favorite candy bars. Now they taste like stale sawdust.
When did “The Customer is Always Right” turn into “The Customer Has No Rights”?
Olives are just wrong.
Honestly, why do men have nipples? I really want to know.
LOST better fuckin’ deliver in the end. Big time.
Gen Xers sounds cool. Generation Y sounds kinda lame. But more importantly, what happens after Generation Z?!? Do we start over at A?
My whole childhood was a lie. Pluto’s not a planet. That big dinosaur’s not a brontosaurus. And you definitely won’t go blind from doing it too many times.
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Comments
Ha ha ha…
What if men have nipples as part of evolution. Sure now they’re just starting to become stay at home dads, but perhaps one day thousands of years from now they’ll be breastfeeding, ROFL.
My favorite is the snowblower joke…I have to tell my husband that one, I know he’ll appreciate it, lol.
Hope you have a great day Andrew:)
Tish - HAHAHA! Well if you had nuts to give for time travel, you could give one, then go back in time and get it back…
Jason - Hmm. That could be true. But I’ll 1-up you and say the worstest drivers ever will be mini-van drivers who are wearing hats.
Christy - I refuse to accept your explanation. And I don’t plan on sticking around thousands of years to find out. Hope you have a great day too!
I second that about LOST. I haven’t spent cumulative days of my life watching the series for Hurley to wake up and realize it was all a dream. Oh, and Meri..I mean Charlie had a moment of duechebaggery, but he better not be dead.
I came by to thank you for nominating Writer’s Reviews, that is so absolutely…extremely nice of you to do!!!!
I appreciate it sooo much!
Hugs:)
Nobody one-ups me and gets away unscathed - mini-van drivers who are wearing hats **and are legally blind**.
Oh yeah.
CG - If it’s any sort of dream whatsoever, I will NEVER trust J.J. Abrams again in my entire life. Though I really don’t think it is. I’m sure it’s some insane time travel craziness that will leave everyone scratching their heads.
Christy - You are more then welcome!
Tish - Oy…
Jason - Hmmm….. I really don’t like backing down from challenges, y’know. And this could go on forever but I’ll take another shot at it just to tick off the masses. How’s this for worstest drivers ever: Mini-van drivers who are wearing hats and are legally blind AND… are women! (Oh, no he didn’t!? Yes he did!)
Great post, Andrew! If I had nuts, I’d give my left one to make time travel possible too!